☕ THE GREAT COFFEE BREAK PLAN
Welcome, coffee commander! Prepare for an extraordinary caffeine quest.
Step by step, we shall glide into the abyss of alertness using only the following ridiculous protocols:
- Sip a reality‑altering mug that only functions when you think of it.
- Perform a ceremonial dance while dangling a rubber chicken—this calibrates the grinder.
- Serve exactly 8.0001 ounces of brew to honor the infinite decimal pi of perfection.
- Rotate the office chair exactly 93.571219743 times (or as many half‑turns as your chair permits).
- Exchange a secret nod with the nearest spreadsheet wizard, the sign of the triple backtick.